Recent Posts

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The Drawing Room / Re: Greetings
« Last post by Sunflower on Today at 07:01:33 AM »
:waving Morning. Meeting my bessie for :coffee this morning.
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The Drawing Room / Re: Greetings
« Last post by Dell-Boy on Today at 06:19:09 AM »
1st in .........again.

 :waving  Morning.       :sunny      Bright sunny start.
We had a thunderstorm here yesterday evening. Needed the rain for the garden and lawn which was beginning to look like a Utah desert.
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The Belfry / Re: General Jokes
« Last post by Scott on Yesterday at 07:58:35 PM »
Veterans of Foreign Wars
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The Belfry / Re: General Jokes
« Last post by Sunflower on Yesterday at 05:59:04 PM »
:laugh Very good! :think What's a VFW? :shrug
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The Library / Re: Today's News!
« Last post by Sunflower on Yesterday at 05:53:09 PM »
It's all Mel's fault :D
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The Drawing Room / Re: Greetings
« Last post by Sunflower on Yesterday at 05:52:43 PM »
:roar

:waving Evening. Chilly here, about 10'. And about 10' colder than it is in London.
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The Belfry / Re: General Jokes
« Last post by Percy Vere on Yesterday at 02:24:42 PM »
Old ones from my American friend:


I was standing at the bar at the VFW one night minding my own business.  This FAT ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said, "You're kinda cute. You gotta phone number?"
I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?"
She said, "Yeah, I got a pen".
I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you."
Cost me 6 stitches but, when you’re over seventy, who cares?
**********
I went to the drug store and told the clerk "Give me 3 packets of condoms, please."
Lady Clerk:  "Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?”
I said "Nah... She's purty good lookin'"
When you’re over seventy, who cares?
**********
I was talking to a young woman in the VFW last night.  She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right.”
I said, “If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you.”
Cost me a fat lip but when you’re over seventy, who cares?
**********
I was telling a woman in the Club about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her breasts.
"Really" she said, "Go on then, try."
After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose patience and said, "Come on, what day was I born?"
I said, "Yesterday."
Cost me a kick in the nuts but when you’re over seventy, who cares?
*********
I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today.  The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in.  When you’re over seventy, who cares?
**********
I went to our VFW last night and saw a BIG woman dancing on a table.
I said, "Good legs."
The girl giggled and said, "Do you really think so?"
I said, "Definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now."
Cost me 6 more stitches but when you’re over seventy, who cares?
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The Library / Re: Today's News!
« Last post by Percy Vere on Yesterday at 12:29:07 PM »
:laugh but can we keep politics off the forum please?
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The Drawing Room / Re: Greetings
« Last post by Percy Vere on Yesterday at 12:26:44 PM »
 :wave

:think  What??  :confused is she pregnant already??  :D

It wouldn't surprise me 1 little bit if she wasn't 36hrs pregnant :laugh
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The Drawing Room / Re: Greetings
« Last post by Buckaroo on Yesterday at 08:54:28 AM »
Hot and sunny here. Morning all.  :waving
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